Wispid

The church where former president George Bush attended while growing up and where his parents’ funerals were held was being investigated for having a computer with child porn images on it.

The lawyer decided to take the fall by destroying the computer.

The lawyer faces 14 months in prison for obstructing an FBI investigation that led to the conviction of the church’s music director for having child porn.

Meanwhile, the ex-prez is seeing a counselor and facing hypnotism to see if there might have been something in his past.

A 30-year old man who was having a fight with his 26-year old girl friend decided to take it out on an 18-month old toddler by punching the little girl in the face and then assaulting her mother (the girlfriend, too?)

He’s in jail.

18-months old are lining up everywhere to take turns at his face.

It was about 4:30pm as the woman walked home from the train station.

Suddenly, from behind a man came up lifted up her dress, pulled down and off her panties, grabbed her bag and ran away.

No attempt was made to sexually assault the woman who didn’t realize her bag was stolen till sometime later.

Great technique on the thief’s part…if thieves can be complimented at all.

Create a diversion, then make off with the goods.

This sounds like something that would make a good sub-story line on Grey’s Anatomy.

A 67-year old bone cancer patient was given a CT scan. So far so good.

But the lab technician apparently forgot about her for several hours.

She eventually crawled out of the tube but found herself locked in the closed clinic.

Mom called her son who told her to call 911.

The woman had been there for about 5 hours.

“Relax,” said the paramedic. “We are taking you to the hospital.”

“AGghh!!”

A 52-year old grandpa asked his 4-year old granddaughter to steal a purse from an arcade in New Jersey just after midnight.

One immediately wonders what the little girl is still doing up after midnight.

Gramps pushed the little girl under a swinging security door with his foot and told the child to steal a worker’s purse.

Investigators caught up with him after an anonymous phone call and failed attempts to use the stolen ATM card.

The children’s mom had let her dad take the kids out for the day.

I guess, we all have to think more carefully now, whether or not we really want grandma and grandpa to watch the kids, eh?

I wrote earlier that Police Needed Help finding Pervert Who Abused Little Girl.

The little girl has been found and is now safe.

The man, however, is still on the run.

A better picture has been posted…and he has been given a name - Chester Arthur Stiles.

The tape of the man and the little girl was recorded over another encounter of the man with an older girl….now 13…then 11.

At any rate…here’s the image.

If you see the guy, you know what to do.

A Scottish dude, apparently quite capable of holding his own at the local pub, chugged down 60 pints.

For four weeks he complained of ‘wavy’ vision and a non-stop headache.

Doctors were stumped until an ophthalmologist observed:

1. swollen optical discs

2. , greatly enlarged blind spots

3. “flame hemorrhages,” or bleeding nerve fibres.

It took the man four days to consume the 60 pints (35 liters).

The man also suffered from severe dehydration.

Another clue might have been him spending six hours a day relieving himself, no?

Doctors treated him for six months – long-term blood-thinning – to restore his vision to normal and to get rid of the headaches.

Feeling better, he headed for the pub.

Sometimes there is justice in the world.

A lawyer who was accused of breaking into a pharmacy jumped head first from a fifth story ledge and landed on the roof, head first, of a two story building…and survived.

Paramedics found him verbal, obviously, and conscious.

The first thing he likely said, “I’m going to sue the building that got in the way of my suicide attempt!”

Yeah…I know pretty is relative. But this 31-year old teacher at a Christian Academy is pretty enough that someone loved her, married her and they had two kids.

She was also pretty enough to be hit on by a 15-year old student.

Sadly, she was stupid enough to give in.

They had sex at his home, her mother’s home and in a hotel.

Persistence, an otherwise good quality, paid off according to the boy.

He wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer, and in the end she couldn’t say ‘no.’

The part-time English teacher resigned and is out on a $50,000 personal bond.

A 40-year old Shimane University associate professor resigned after he sexually harassed two female students.

First, he served a three month suspension…then he called it quits.

Shimane University has had three instructors punished in the past two years for sexual harassment.

His crime – “you have a good figure.” And, he touched their hair.

However, on another occasion – drunk, of course, he kicked one woman and yanked the other’s muffler during a drinking party.

When the student’s had had enough…they brought the issue to university authorities who after a fact finding session, decided the prof was guilty.

I wonder…does he really think it was worth it…getting drunk with his students.