Wispid

My friends gave me a T-shirt when I was in high school that said Masterbatter.

I wore it most of the day until the counselor told me to turn it inside out.

I was naive and didn’t understand why.

I am not so naive now…nor is Southwest Airlines.

They told a passenger to turn his shirt inside out because on the back

it said  MASTERBAITER.

Arguments that the airline was violating his right to free speech won out.

However, his statement – “Who’s to say what’s offensive and what’s not?”

If it offends, it’s offensive, knothead.

If had been wearing wings, maybe he would have gotten away with it…but.

A man showed up at a church in Tallahassee and attacked his boss.

The man met his boss to give him a time sheet but they ended up arguing over money. Didn’t he know that nobody likes to talk about money at church?

Church members were able to disarm him…with the Sword of the Lord perhaps? before the police arrived.

See what happens when you bring your work to church and don’t enjoy a day of rest?

Happy Valley is no longer a happy place for a nude gardener after the City Council made it “unlawful for any person to expose his or her genitals while in a public place or place visible from a public place.”

Neighbors complained.

The postal carrier asked to have his route changed.

Others complained to his employer, the police, the media, the city…

He must have been seriously ugly underneath.

But, what can you expect from a 51-year old?

If I ran around naked, people would be angry with me, too.

Do you think people should be allowed to garden in the nude?

Do you know anyone you wish they’d make it a requirement to garden in the nude?

The Amazing Philippine Beauty Contest is underway at a hotel in Pasay City, south of Manila.

The event is in its fifth year.

I almost got involved with a Filipino girl when I was in the Navy…but it didn’t work out.

Before you pick your type….scroll down.

They are transvestites.

more pix

A couple is suing Dell Computer Co. for $50.5 million. (How do they come up with these figures?)

The couple claims

1. Dell replaced their broken computer four times

2. a tech support rep repeatedly called them late at night

3. the tech rep sent them images and emails with the subject line – Devil People in East Asia.

Yup….I guess that adds up to $50 million.

The images had Asians doing some pretty nasty things.

To be double sure:

The couple claims

4. Dell is not controlling the people they outsource to.

5. Dell could not make good though replacing PCs for the couple five times.

The lawyer convinced her to tell Dell she was-

6. led her to “severe and permanent personal injuries and emotional distress.”

7. deprived her husband of her companionship

8. she threw up because she remembered several miscarriages she had

I’ve calculated that she is owed a PC for free.

How about you?

One of four gay men who was spotted by firemen dogging it (engaging in sexual activity with strangers) complained to the Avon Fire and Rescue, accusing the four-man crew of being homophobic.

The firemen crew had spotted the four dudes going at it in the bushes and shined their torches (flashlights) on them.

After the men were duly embarrassed, the key words being bare and ass, the firemen went on.

But, one of the four fellows followed with the complaint.

As a result, the four firemen were given a 3 month paid holiday – suspension with pay.

Two were also fined 1,000 pounds, one was demoted and the fourth given a stern written warning.

Let’s see, if I go at it with strangers in the bushes and someone spots me, I can get the spotters demoted.

Hmm…and we wonder why America wanted to break free from Britain.

Of course, it’s not much better here in the states, to be sure.